Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
