Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
sex in a hospital.. check
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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