i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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