Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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