she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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