Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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