The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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