I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
