No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
