On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize