Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
