i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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