we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
