I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
