I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
