Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
