Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
