My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
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