And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
