never play flip cup with pint glasses
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
