Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
