Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
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