i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
