...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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