remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Randomize
