So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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