I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize