I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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