Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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