Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
