I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize