just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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