You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
