Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
