exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize