Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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