I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
