Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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