Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
The power of my boobs compel you
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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