ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i just made my gag reflex go away.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
