um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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