There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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