maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
