Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
