Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
