I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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