If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
