At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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