Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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