And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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